Blog Post 002 - August 29 2013 | "Boy"

I know I'm hard on you. I know that. You can't hold it against me, though. I'm doing you a favor. You'll see. Don't show weakness; never cry, especially when other people can see you. Don't get into a fight, but if you do, win it. Keep your muscles strong, but don't worry too much about how fat you get; girls don't care about that anyway. You like girls, right, son? You'd better. You have to treat your woman right. Never raise a hand against her, even when you're drunk. But, don't let her run all over you. You're the head of the household. You make the rules, always. Always push yourself hard to provide for your family. Work hard, and don't complain. You'd better decide if you're gonna be a white collar pencil-pusher, or a blue collar kind of man. Either way can provide, but make your choice and stick with it. It's important to spend time with your buddies. A real man watches football every Sunday with the boys. You send your wife away when it's football time. Like I said, don't let her run things, but don't be a jerk to her either. You'll learn the balance one day.

What about art, or literature, or music?

Forget that. Forget all that. Your job is to be a man. You work hard and you expect some things in return. A hot plate of food and a warm bed isn't too much to ask for after a long day at work. You want to go stare at some paintings like some kinda wussy boy? Go do that shit in New York or something, and leave the hard country work to the real men. Son, men make sacrifices. We can't afford to be seen playin' the flute or somethin' like that. You wanna do that, might as well go be a cheerleader. Might as well be on the flag squad instead of the football team. You understand what I mean?

I think so. I'll do my best, Dad.

I know you will, son. And I'll always love you. Just don't disappoint me.


Thoughts:

This was a little more difficult for me to write than usual, for a couple of reasons. First off, the writing style is decidedly unusual. I didn't go quite as semicolon-crazy as Jamaica Kincaid did, but this exercise shares the terse, rough qualities of her work.

The other reason this was difficult was that it's uncomfortable to write things from a perspective I don't agree with. I have been lucky enough to have been born into an accepting, loving family. I was never pushed hard to be a "man's man". I know a lot of men who were, though, and they tell me stories of being borderline abused by their fathers if they stepped out of line (disobeyed an order, acted too feminine, etc.)

Obviously there are some elements of homophobia in what I've written. Again, this is purely from a perspective of what I could imagine a father in perhaps a rural, religious area of America might be like. Young men are pushed hard to act like men, to be brave and tough, and obviously anything other than perfect heterosexual behavior is strictly forbidden by the "Unwritten Code of Men", at least in certain families. These are not beliefs that I personally share, it's just what immediately sprung to mind when I thought of this sort of old-fashioned, tough-guy dad giving life lessons to his son might be.

Another aspect of this is the discouragement of pursing the arts. Young men are sometimes encouraged to just focus on the tangible, physical things in life, especially if they come from a long line of blue collar workers. They are born into this sort of clear delineation that tells them, "hey, even if you're smart enough to do advanced math or can paint beautiful pictures, your place is here in the shop working on engines. Your place is out on the field scoring touchdowns."

A final note is that I get a strong sense from Girl that the mother is trying to relive her life vicariously through her daughter, and is pushing her to avoid making the same mistakes she did. The key difference here between legitimate advice and something that is harmful is that the mother isn't doing it out of the goodness of her heart; she's doing it because she wants to go back in time and correct her own mistakes, in a way.

Blog Post 001 - August 27 2013 | Introduce Yourself

Introduce Yourself


My name is Josh Marugg. I'm taking this class to fulfill a core requirement for my degree. I'm a sophomore, and my major is mathematics.

1. My greatest asset is __________.
2. The nicest thing I ever did for anyone was __________.
3. The nicest thing anyone ever did for me was __________.
4. One question I have about life is ___________.
5. One thing I've always wondered about is ___________.
6. My teachers last year will tell you that I am a strong writer.
7. My friends will tell you that I am a little moody sometimes.
8. People like me because I have a good sense of humor.
9. One thing most people don't know about me is I have a rare autoimmune condition called interstitial cystitis.
10. I am an expert on strength training (but I haven't been active in the sport for a couple years).
11. I want to know more about everything.
12. When I am 50, I will still be playing video games.
13. Five years from now, I will hopefully be able to play guitar very well.
14. When I want to, I have the ability to be really tenacious in the face of adversity.
15. A famous person I admire is Nietzsche because I am a nihilist and I appreciate his world view.
16. The bravest thing I ever did was _____________.
17. I have trouble dealing with early morning math classes.
18. I appreciate it when teachers recognize that some people are introverts and we don't like constant group projects.
19. I am proud of my __________.
20. I like ___________ because ___________.
21. I really need to ___________.
22. My favorite class is __________ because __________.
23. My friends make me laugh when they ____________.
24. My pet peeve is people who talk out of turn in class, or speak arrogantly to the professor.
25. When I am sad I get pretty damn cynical.
26. The most stressful thing in my life is worrying about my future.
27. The most influential person in my life is __________ because __________.
28. If I had one hundred dollars, I would probably spend it.
29. I am named for ___________.
30. It was easy to learn how to read.
31. It is difficult to learn how to interact with other people gracefully.
32. I have no regrets about __________.
33. I regret a lot of things, but it's time to move forward in life. 
34. A friend once showed me how to ___________.
35. I like ____________ music, particularly these songs: ____________.
36. My favorite color is green.
37. One dish I can cook well is ___________.
38. My favorite place on earth is being alone in my room or in a quiet environment.
39. What is a mistake that taught you a lesson? What did you learn?: I have learned to be less vocal about certain things, particularly personal problems or things about me that are not another person's business.
40. What is an obstacle you face in completing this class? How can you, your classmates, and your teacher help you get around it? : I don't really foresee too many obstacles in this class. I have always been a very strong reader and writer. I'm not saying that out of a sense of arrogance or entitlement, but my professors have generally be very pleased with my work. So, we'll see how things go in this class.